Expanding the connection with the world
In the mid of a worldwide corona virus crisis, what are you doing for yourself and for your family? I am trying to live my TCM life: cooking delicious five elements recipes for my family, teaching creatively Chinese to my own kids and practicing Qigong with them, and reading books as well as sharing some part of it with you. Hopefully you might find them helpful or simply get my positive message.
A lecture and a conversation from a TCM doctor of Li Xin
The mental development and expression of vitality that I just talked about, let’s take yesterday ’s news as an example, a boat in the Yangtze River overturned. I read some comments on the Internet, and many people are praying. This prayer, to the individual, is a thing that one accomplishes in his heart, an important thing.
Although it is a matter of „someone“ very far away, praying and sending blessings, and doing it on the level of consciousness, actually expands our connection with the world, a positive connection, and an active expansion.
In the details of life, everything that can be accomplished is first accomplished in our consciousness or in our hearts. In other words, only what has started in your heart will start in your real life.
We are easily constrained by the external environment, conditions, time, and space. We will think that we can only be like this, and many changes are difficult to begin.
Everyone thinks that if a loved one has died, there is no way to communicate and interact with him; or if a person can no longer be contacted, there is no way to communicate, and some things can’t be made up for.
But if we have a desire to communicate with him in our hearts, and we have a clear idea of what we want to express, then in fact, this „communication“ has already begun in our hearts. Then, there will be an opportunity for us to accomplish this in reality. Whether the object is the same person or not, the meaning behind it is the same. Sometimes, there is no suitable opportunity in reality. We just do it in our hearts. From a psychological or spiritual level, it has changed our world and inner integrity.
Earlier you mentioned the pain caused by my short height, I have the same pain for many years as you, and I would like to talk about my own experience. In my high school, self-awareness began to slowly build up. I read a lot of inspirational books that mentioned: Deng Xiaoping was short, Napoleon was short, etc. But I soon realized that I couldn’t be such a powerful person. Psychology rationalized this process. It’s easy to find rationalization in any way, with the goal of self-identification.
I once saw an ancient view, which is very interesting. It says that people who are very short in their lives may have bad tempers in their past lives, and may be good masters of martial arts and good fighters. They are used to using violence to solve problems.
Another point of view is also interesting. It says that in this life, people who have suffered miserable and unpopular people may be particularly unreasonable and powerful in the last life. They have given directions to others, disregarded the feelings of others, and did not observe the pain of others .. …. For so long, this part of the blind spot of consciousness and spirit will form a malformed direction for the development of our humanity.
As human beings who are constantly evolving as individuals and as a whole, as well as in the spiritual realm, we will experience different roles in different lives, such as the opportunity to get a smaller, weaker shell, and the opportunity to live in the context of different classes, so You have to experience feelings you haven’t experienced before and learn another way to communicate with the world.
When I was young, I had a strong sense of justice and was very impatient. Every time I wanted to help, I looked at my opponent who was too strong. I wouldn’t have any chance of beating him. I have to see if there is another way to go. This is passive learning of other aspects, otherwise we will always use the „knife“ that is the best to complete the task.
Many people have successfully dealt with the problem one or more times, and then there is a success model, after which all problems want to be handled in this mode. In this way, our mental model will be very narrow. This dependence on a single success model might result in mental and physical problems. Sometimes it will be a serious problem. Therefore, being short and ugly, being physically inferior or having defects in some aspects is not necessarily a bad thing from this perspective. It makes it possible for us to be more grounded and solid, and to have the opportunity to learn about the past negligence, have the opportunity to experience and learn another life, and to have the opportunity to develop yourself more thoroughly.
The following is a dialogue between a patient whose father and herself are suffering from Lung cancer and Dr. Li:
Doctor Li: Beyond national borders and times, in fact, all the pain is linked. Many intangible things transcend national borders and time and space, so why do people from different denominations gather each year to pray for the earth or the souls who died in the war. It is not just a ceremony of mourning, it is a work in the realm of souls. They believe that the work is very important, to avoid those souls with great pain and hatred, to affect the world in the dark.
Therefore, don’t simply describe our pain as the name of anxiety, depression or other diseases. All the diseases, like the water of pacific ocean, are brought together by many different water sources.
Yesterday, when your dad took a picture of us, I felt something. Like you said, he is a very good person, always thinking about the needs of others, but don’t you have feel that he does not know how to take care of people and how to communicate with others. When he was taking pictures, his spirit and consciousness were relatively closed. When you walked, your parents walked in front of us one after the other. He always walked forward alone. The contact and communication with the surrounding people were flickering, as if avoiding something.
These are actually the effects of the past, and many of our older generations are like this. A tree growing in an unobstructed space, its branches can stretch in any direction, but if many places are blocked by the wall, it can only develop in the remaining spaces. So is love. They only love you in one way now.
Your father’s spirit is very depressed. Lung cancer has a lot to do with depression.
Take care of yourself and your family
Audience: How can I help my dad? Doctor Li: I read an article when I was studying psychology and I was very impressed. The article mentioned: the basis of all psychological counseling and treatment is that the psychologist as a relatively normal person can communicate with the consultant once a week or monthly to allow him to establish a relatively normal communication and interpersonal relationship.
The basis of psychotherapy is empathy. A pool of still water, a deadlock, has been activated in normal communication and relationships, and has the possibility of circulation and transformation.
So we don’t have to be psychologists, we don’t necessarily need to learn those professional psychological concepts and knowledge. You just need to make yourself relatively stable and clear, understand and empathize with their difficulties and pains. The heart’s communication is neither excessive nor alienated, and then your loved ones will be relatively normal.
This is true not only among loved ones, but also among strangers. Everyone in our world is closely related. If you are a little bit more normal, then everyone else will be a little bit more normal.
So I said just now that we can take care of ourselves and our families, that is a great contribution to the world.
Audience: As long as I take care of myself, I can take care of them.
Doctor Li: For example, you know more about them now than they do.
Audience: But I can’t talk with them properly.
Doctor Li: There are two situations here. The first one is that we want to speak out, and we want them to understand, and can think and do as what we think. Actually, this is not necessary, and the effect is not good, and is even counterproductive. The other situation is „doing nothing/less“, but it works. As long as you understand that you don’t need to talk about these things, you just live normally, communicate normally, and get along with them normally. Every day, their world might be changed or cleared a little bit.
This part is easy to understand and difficult to do. We need to practice in life and in friction with them.
Therefore, in the end, we must slowly clear our hearts and let ourselves be a little bit more normal, even if the progress is very slow, each time we can only be one ten thousandth normal than the last time. But our world and the people around us will be able to make the same progress.
If this cornerstone has not been built, consulting Chinese medicine or Western medicine, trying different ways of healing such as acupuncture, moxibustion, practicing qigong, studying psychology, studying TCM, and even studying Buddhism are like high-rise buildings without foundations, the higher the more dangerous.
Audience: So, even if I see my dad’s fear now, I can do nothing right away, right?
Doctor Li: Not necessarily. The main point is that if you have not seen his fear, then in your daily communication, you are unconscious of the state of this part of them, so you can’t reach anything by saying anything or doing anything.
If you start today, you are conscious of the fear in their hearts, although you don’t have to do it if you don’t know how to do it now. You can have a wish in your heart first, and then slowly, you will naturally know what to do.
When you have seen their fear, whether you do it or not, whether or not you have this purpose, your daily communication is different from the past because of your current consciousness. Everything you do is slowly letting this knot of fear loose.
These are not problems that can be solved after we are enlightened and relieved, but problems that can be gradually resolved in our lives at all times. All kinds of entangled problems will begin to show changes and transformations from „being seen“ and „being aware“, so everyone can do it.